This one will be a laugh.

Here we go, story number 3!

So I met this guy through work, as you do. We didn’t work in the same department but one of my managers had worked with him before and said he was ‘so lovely’ and couldn’t say a bad word about him. We got talking and he seemed pretty normal at first. Good chat, he was so easy to talk to and we seemed to have a lot in common. He was 10 years older than me, but that didn’t make any difference. He looked younger and he was pretty fit to be fair. I definitely fancied him!

On our first date we went for a nice, sunny walk near his place. We got on really well! We went over to his after walking, he cooked for me and we just chilled and got to know each other some more. We had a little cuddle and a sneaky kiss on the sofa and it all ended really nicely.

After that, he asked me if I wanted to stay over at the weekend so we could have a drink and I didn’t have to worry about getting home. We all know what that really meant, he was expecting sex. Men! smh.

Well I was single and didn’t care at that point, he was HOT. Again he made food and we had a few gins and one thing lead to another etc etc… So it was the first night I stayed over and he was just sooo awkward. As soon as we got in bed he put ear plugs in, turned over and went silent. He didn’t even say good night?! So weird. In the morning things seemed alright so I thought I’d give him the benefit of the doubt and let the silence slide. He did cook me breakfast to be fair as well.

After I left things seemed okay; less awkward, and he was fairly talkative again. Then it started. It seemed that because we’d now slept together, he thought it was acceptable to try and ‘sext’ and send me pictures. I just didn’t know what to say AGAIN. How do you react?

For some reason I really liked this guy so I tried to go along with the sexting as much as I could, or as much as I would allow myself to haha. The third time we arranged to see each other, I just went round to his again and we had a couple of drinks and watched telly. I was up early for work the next day so we were sensible and got an early night. Sex first, obvs.

It happened again, he just turned over with his earplugs in and went to sleep!? In the morning, my alarm went off early and he was going to stay in bed. You’d think he would be polite and at least say morning to me, but no. He groaned and turned over.

This is where it gets interesting and why this was the last time I saw him. I took my bag and most of my things into the bathroom to get ready so I didn’t disturb him too much and make him even more grumpy. As I was getting ready, I heard his bedroom door close. After I was dressed etc, I stepped out of the bathroom to find he had put my phone on the floor outside his door. He’d sent me a text message saying he was going to get some more sleep and to let myself out, the door key was on the stairs. HOW RUDE!! I was honestly in shock! The funny thing was that I’d left some stuff in his room so I still had to go back in and get it anyway. His door made a right creaky noise, GOOD. I hope it woke him!!

I left at 6am for work anyway. An hour or so after starting work he text me. He said he had never known someone to move so much in their sleep and that he gets angry if he doesn’t get enough sleep. For one, why invite me round on a school night knowing you have work in the morning? And two, I’m obviously to going to sleep very well in someone else’s bed that I’m not used to. It was a joke (not the funny kind).

I tried to laugh it off at first but I just had to tell him how much that annoyed me. Over the next week or so he carried on trying to text and sext and send pics etc. I was just being off with him. Eventually I told him that I didn’t want to see him again and tried to call things off. He then proceeded to send me a lovely dick pic and asked if that would change my mind? Erm, DEFINITELY NOT. That officially made my decision for me. Go away.

This was a longer story than usual, but I hope it brought some entertainment to your day.  My friends either found it funny or were in total shock!

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Did I ask for photo of it?

I don’t understand how guys still haven’t learnt that this puts a girl off. The last three men I’ve dated have ALL sent me dick pics. Yep. So attractive.

I’ve definitely been sent them in the past as well, but these last three were really interesting.

So guy number one… Someone I’ve known for a long time through school friends. He popped back up on Instagram with a little message asking how I’ve been etc. (Instagram plays a big part in many of these stories). We were having nice conversations, back and forth, and really getting on well. I had a good feeling about him as well. Maybe someone from your past comes back into your life for a reason? We’d met up once, then twice, nothing more than a little snog. It was cute. He seemed like a proper gentleman! Then it just fizzled out really. He’d stop responding to messages (thought I’d been ghosted again!) but just randomly sent the odd snapchat or reply to my Insta stories with some heart-eyed emojis or ‘You need to come see me’, but would never follow though with plans.

After a few days of not speaking, I had a snapchat notification saying that he’d sent a video. I thought it would be the usual in the gym or what I’m eating kind of video but I just did not expect this. A video, in the shower, music on, dancing. Everything hanging out. It was actually quite entertaining, but WHY!? I hope I speak for a lot of the female population when I say we just don’t want to see it! I don’t feel like I send any signals that suggest I would want to receive these? They’re not exactly pretty either are they?

I swear to God if I get anymore from guys, I’m going to ghost them myself!!

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Dick pic guy number two will follow in the next blog post. Number three is my fave though. I cannot wait to relive that one…

 

Here Goes…

When I was a teen I thought I would be happily married by this age, I always compared myself to my parents; married at 26 years old and beginning a family.

I turn 27 next week and I’m still sat here single. BUT, the relationships and dates I’ve had over the last 10 years have taught me a lot of lessons. Number 1 – don’t settle.

My dating experiences have been so relatable that I just HAD to share some of them. Also because I want to hear whether or not I am over-reacting, being weird or I’m actually normal!? I’ve been in love, I’ve had one-night stands and I’ve been put off men for the rest of my life. The experiences I will share will contain actual quotes from guys that I’ve been on dates with and I hope you find them as entertaining as I did!

Firstly, why do men tell lies!? ‘Just know I’m not just after sex’. Well why after the deed is done do you then go cold? There have been a few times where I have been ghosted after this. Am I just shit in bed? Has my body put you off? Maybe other guys have been lying as well when they’ve said the sex was good. Even dating someone that’s 9 years older than me didn’t work.

Us girls can’t do anything right these days. You hold off and don’t have sex with someone and they then stop responding to texts because you didn’t put out. WHAT DO YOU WANT?! Why can’t I just find a nice guy, decent job and aspirations, who’s honest, loyal and doesn’t just want to date a girl for sex. I’m not asking for much, right?

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